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Guest Blogger Friday: BRINGING BABY HOME AND SURVIVING THE TRANSITION – TIPS FOR SURVIVING

Guest Blogger Friday: BRINGING BABY HOME AND SURVIVING THE TRANSITION – TIPS FOR SURVIVING

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Morning all my lovely readers and welcome back to MomEtc! I have had such a busy couple of weeks and now that things have finally calmed down I am so excited to be able to put in more time blogging. Like some of you know I launched the MomEtc YouTube Channel and I am overwhelmed with the amount of love and support I have received so far- so to you, thank you! You can check out the channel directly here

Ok so back to Guest Blogger Friday, I can get a bit sidetracked especially when having too much fun! So today I want you to meet Amanda who is the owner of greenteaandcotton. I met this wonderful blogger through Instagram of course and after reading some of her blog posts I stumbled on this one and of course had to share it with my readers. I think any mother out there can relate to this post ( I know I did) so I hope you enjoy!

I recently interviewed a few mom friends and scoured the internet to bring you some tips on surviving the transition period when you bring a new child home.  Bringing home a child, whether it is your first or fifth, brings challenges to every aspect of life under your roof.  I’m here to provide some helpful tips to surviving those first few months, even years, and a little humor along the way.

 Before I get started, let me give you a little bit of info about me and my children.  I became a mom at the age of 22, then at 24, 26, and and again at almost 29.  Each of my children are 26 months apart from their next sibling.  To say the least, I have spent the better part of my 20’s covered in spit-up, poop, and crap in my hair or on my shoulder without ever realizing it.  My boobs have maybe seen the inside of a Victoria Secret bra for a combined total of 12 months since having children and the idea of a nice outfit is something that won’t look bad if I spill yogurt on it.  Oh, I forgot to mention…I have 3 boys followed by a little girl. My days are filled with math problems and reading and breaking up fights that the 4 year old instigates.  Did I mention we have a dog?  Yeah, that thing.  He really deserves a medal.  Enough about me.  Let’s get you some good tips for survival!

 Many of the comments I received ranged from very practical to down right sarcasm to keep your sanity. I received comments from first time moms to well seasoned veterans in the game and I will break it down from no children to adding your third child – after adding the third child, you become well aware of what works and what doesn’t.  I’ll give you enough to survive the time when you become outnumbered and your warrior decides to climb a baptismal font with a K’nex sword he finagled from an 11 year old and does a warrior cry. True story.

  No Children/First Born
Having no children provides a set of challenges in a category all by itself.  You have no idea how long labor will be, if the child will be easy or difficult, if breastfeeding will work out, or how your relationship dynamics will change – and trust me they will change and not all change is bad.  Remember that….change is not bad!!
People are pretty eager to throw a first time mom a baby shower.  If you have a couple of people that are willing to do it, TAKE THEM UP ON THE OFFER! Who cares if you have 3 baby showers? What I will say though, is one of those baby showers needs to be a freezer meal baby shower. Let me explain…Little Benny is cute and all of those outfits are going to be so cute on him but let’s get real.  The majority of his clothes he will grow out of before he has a chance to wear them 5 times, unless your child has severe acid reflux like my 1st did.  At that point you will be spending your time naked and wrapped in a blanket – A LOT!  Nobody wants to do that much laundry, but I digress. 
Back to the freezer meal baby shower.  This is a baby shower that instead of diapers, cute clothes, and knitted blankets, your guests shower you with meals.  Trust me, you will need them.  Whether your labor was picture perfect or insane like a movie, having those meals ready at your disposal will not only save you sanity, it’ll save your pocket book.  Instead of trying to figure out this new person that has now been thrusted into your life and all the demands of being an adult – grocery shopping, house cleaning, laundry, you catching my drift? – it’ll allow you to breathe and figure things out one step at a time.
For that postpartum time, make a safety bubble.  This safety bubble needs to have easy snacks, water, some diapers, a good book, your favorite lotion and anything else that makes you happy.
Ask for help.  Let me say that again – ASK FOR HELLLPPPP!!!!  Call that friend over to hold your crying baby while you take a shower.  Heaven knows you haven’t had one in 5 days and if you go one more day, you might just have a mental breakdown.  Now to be real – your child will cry and will cry for reasons you haven’t figured out yet and even though they cry less in your arms, you need to take care of yourself.  So if you haven’t showered in 5 days and have only slept 12 hours in those 5 days, call someone.  You’ll be better off for it.
Babywear!  Buy yourself, or better yet, make your own Moby.  Directions here. This gives baby the sensation he or she is still in the womb and gives you both hands free.  Not to mention it keeps strangers from coming up and breathing on your baby. From here as baby gets older you can graduate to other carriers – ring slings, SSC, woven wraps, etc.
Talk with your significant other.  Communication is going to be so key during any transition phase.  As a woman who just gave birth, your body needs time to heal.  Communicate your needs and listen to your significant other and their needs.  This time of change can be good for both of you.  
Let your significant other help.  Trust me.  He or she will do just fine in changing diapers, rocking, feeding, etc.  Let them have the chance and when they offer, take them up on it.  It’ll give you a rest and them some time to really get comfortable with baby.
1 Child – Adding a Sibling
 
So now little Johnny is about 3 years old and you’re bringing home little Abigail.  You had some insight into how labor might go and you are now experienced.  You can distinguish between a hunger cry and “I need my diaper changed now” cry.  Life has been good but you’re afraid of how little Johnny is going to be to his sister.  
Let me reassure you….He will be fine.  In fact, as the oldest, he will take pride in being your little helper. He will want to help out so much you will feel suffocated at times.  Motherhood is about honesty.  It has to be in order to survive.  Even though you will feel suffocated at times, and may yell because little Abby kept you up all night, you will witness, while making dinner, little Johnny reading  to little Abby a book and her babbling back and the world will be ok.
So what tips to make this time easier?  Everything from above is still relevant so let’s go back to pregnancy time.  Take time to do things with little Johnny.  Take day trips or weekend trips.  Talk with him about your pregnancy and the baby moving.  Let him feel the baby kick.  Throw yourself a baby shower or a freezer meal shower.  Tips to survive now that baby is here:– Wear your baby.  It’ll keep your hands free to deal with little Johnny and it’ll keep baby happy, cozy, and content. – If little Johnny is still taking naps, use the afternoon nap of baby and little Johnny to catch up on some sleep for yourself.  30 minutes will make a world of difference and then you’ll still have time to throw a load of laundry in.

– Ask for help.  Whether that helps is from a neighbor friend or church members.  People will help but only if you ask.

– Schedule a date night and/or a girl’s night out every three months.  If you can swing it every month, do it!  It’ll make you feel like a woman and help you reconnect with your significant other and friends.

2 Children – Becoming Outnumbered
 
You are now a pro!  You’ve learned to handle bed times and bath times for two little human beings, navigating their personality quirks, and seeing when a meltdown is about to happen and how to divert from it, but now you’re pregnant with child number 3!  What to do?  Not much different than the above tips.  Only this time you are going to have to be a bit more creative.  You will now be outnumbered!  
The one thing I will tell any mom whether the it is their first child or 17th….babywear!  Especially in those first few months when all the baby does is eat, poop, and scream.  Most babies, I can’t say all, will sleep better when worn thus resulting in less crying.  If you want to know all about babywearing and its benefits, leave a comment and I will dedicate an entire post to babywearing.  
 Tips to survive this time plus the aforementioned items above:
– Once again…throw a freezer meal baby shower.  Who wants to worry about cooking when boobs are engorged and baby has their nights and days mixed up?  No one.  Now you have 2 other littles you have to feed so having a well stocked pantry and freezer will make this time so much easier.  
– Once you finally get into a routine, meal plan.  Even if you meal plan for the entire month but shop weekly, this will take an enormous amount of stress of of you and your significant other.  
– Take a bath or shower by yourself.  Do not invite your children in with you. It’ll ruin your relaxation.  As my very sarcastic friend Vicki puts it, “It’ll override your fairly normal desire to drown yourself.”  She is kidding, but the stress you will feel if you invite your littles into the bathroom while you are trying to relax, well…it doesn’t equal relaxation!  
– Plan date nights and girl’s nights out.  Get a hobby.  You will be busy with 3 kids but making sure there is time for you will ensure their survival, your survival, and your significant other’s survival.
I hope these tips will help you or any other expecting mom survive those first few months of transition with a new baby.  The one thing I didn’t go deep into in each category, but is so important, let your significant help.  Let them help with dishes, laundry, house cleaning, grocery shopping.  If they offer, let them.  If you ask them, let them do it their way.  It may not be perfect but it’ll be the first step into letting your life become just a little bit easier and stress free.
What other tips would you give?  Laundry, meal times, play dates, etc.  Let me know in the comments what worked for your family and what didn’t.  Did you get any off the wall suggestions and did they work or not?
How awesome was this post ladies?? I have loved featuring different mommy blogs & writers over the course of the last few weeks since it has been launched. I would love to hear your thoughts on this post and all the other Guest Friday’s that I have done. You can either send me a private email or feel free to comment below! Until next time everyone & I can’t wait post some exciting stuff next week. Have a safe & wonderful weekend <3

Monika Tournaud

4 Comments

  1. Mika Beggs 06/26/2015

    Haha I love this! Thanks for the tips because fairly sooner than I like to mention I will totally be outnumbered.

    1. Monika Tournaud
      Monika Tournaud 07/02/2015

      Hi Mika!

      Yay & congrats! I have been having some email/server problems the last week or so! I will get back to you as soon as the email system is back up running though! 🙂

      XO

  2. Gaby 06/30/2015

    I love the idea of a freezer meal baby shower for a 2nd or 3rd child. She has some great ideas! My favorite is the perspective that once you have even more kids it becomes even more important to make sure you stay true to yourself, continue your passions, etc. Many moms think the more kids they have, the more they have to unilaterally fall into the “motherhood” role, but they are better mothers when they are inspired by their own passions and not just by their children.

    1. Monika Tournaud
      Monika Tournaud 07/02/2015

      Hi Gaby!

      I am glad you liked the guest blogger from last week! It’s always nice to hear that people like what you do. She does have some amazing posts! I hope you continue following her blog 🙂

      M

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